upsidedown house

how i got my garbage can

About a week ago I noticed that there are 4 city garbage cans sitting on the curb about 4 blocks from the UpsidedownHouse in front of an abandoned lot, amidst piles of garbage, and it doesn't look like anyone is coming for them anytime soon. I think, "those things are $40 new, there's my can just sitting there waiting for me to take it to it's new home".

I swing by one day to see if they're still there and there's a few guys burning some of the trash around, or from within, the cans in a small white plastic bucket. Why? If they are trying to burn what's in them to make it easier to take them away that makes no sense, better to just light a bonfire right there on the side of the road. And it's not cold out.

After work a few days ago I swing by the house to check in and drop some things off and remember about my garbage can waiting for me, so I hop in the car and sure enough they are all still there. This is the first time I actually got out and now I can see that they have a bunch of fairly heavy auto junk in them. That's not really so surprising since for about a mile radius of where I stood the area is filled with tires, bumpers from stripped cars, car parts and all sorts of items that people are dumping around here.

My first attempt to get it back to the house was just plain stupid. I'm standing on the back bumper of my beat down Honda trying to pull it up to me and then over the hatch and get on the roof of the car. No way. I'm falling over and it's falling down, and no one is in sight, thankfully. Next try. I know, I'll go up the front and just wheel it up over the front bumper, onto the hood and onto the top of the car. No problem, so I'm in, take off and the can goes flying off the back, spilling out trash. Mind you, this is after a long day of work.

Yea, I should have thought about what happens when you leave something on your car and take off. Take 3. I grab a strap out of my collection of ropes, bungies and stuff out of the car and hurriedly wrap it around the handle after it's back up top. Still no one around yet, you gotta love Detroit in moments like this for how empty it is at times. SO, I slam one end of the strap into the car door after I get in and put my left hand on one of the wheels and somehow with my right get it into the first couple of gears. Finally we're off and finallly there are some cars behind me and in front at the stop sign ahead. SO, what am I paying attention to at this point. The heavy can on top of the car barely held in place with my hand, the stop sign or the cars waiting at it?

I stop too suddenly and the can goes flying forward plus swinging out, because it is attached to a strap on my side of the car. In the next instance it comes flying back in an almost graceful arc right back into the side of my car. I'm still looking at the guys in the truck and notice the whole time they just stared. Not even a laugh.

I get out to survey the damage. More oily trash on the ground, and I've had enough. The cars go by, I go home and decide to walk back for the can. It was only a few blocks by that time and now I have a garbage can and saved $40. I think I should paint it like the earth, or maybe like my Red Honda, what do you think?

posted by the upsidedown house @ 11:29 AM